Thursday, May 5, 2011

Balancing on a Cliff:My Financial Future

While, I've been investing my monies in the stock market for some time now, and I've had my ups and downs, made some money and lost some money, but one thing I cannot wait for is the Bureau of Labor and Statistics' nonfarm payrolls report tomorrow. This report could make or break my week, month, year, and life because right now my entire portfolio is going against the bull market. All of the miniscule amount of money in the world that has my name on it is hoping for a small number tomorrow and a massive selloff in equities so my money can transform into a Ferrari, a sweet motorcycle, or maybe so that I can have any money left at all.

I know that putting all of my proverbial eggs into a single basket is extremely risky, but sometimes you just have to do something massively stupid because your gut is telling you to. I probably should have postponed listening to my gut and eaten some tacos, but oh well. It only feels fitting now that I should realize what I've done and produce some quotes from famous people about

  1. how you have to risk to gain
  2. how a fool and his money are soon parted
  3. how to only way to leave a casino with a small fortune is to go there with a large one
 but I'll wait and see what tomorrow brings. These are my two options for tomorrow, bad or good.

even george washington knows that the stock market will make you cry sometimes with a bear market
stock broker that made way too much money from the market crash of 2011

Lets just hope that 1. tomorrow goes very well and 2. that accounts cannot overflow, but that mine will test that theory.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011


the president of Cold Steel holding his precious Dragonfly Katana that can cut through anything

I was wondering whether or not the military would allow a member to carry a sword as a weapon, because if I was to join the military I would almost always take a sword with me. Most military personnel carry knives for hand to hand combat, why not swords? Imagine the situation, you're in a close quarters fight with some guy, he has a knife, what weapon would you choose (no guns, cannons, laser pistols, superhero powers, or invincibility) I'd choose a  medium sized sword. With my luck I'd probably end up killing myself with my own sword(which is why I don't own one yet), but at least I'd start out with a weapon advantage.

In my brief search through the interwebs I have come across a company that has one of the most fitting names I've ever seen, Cold Steel. The name alone made me want to look into this company, and what I found is some entertaining stuff, you see, Cold Steel prides themselves on the quality of their cutlery, so they produce videos of their products cutting stuff in a medieval dungeon set. That is where the awesomeness ensues.

Skip to 1:20 and the guy is bending the sword about 70 degrees. Cool, you think, that sword is very flexible, but what speaks to me the most is the guys safety gear. 1 eye shield. Come on, if that sword breaks the last thing on my mind would be to protect my eyes, that thing can cut through a whole pig(later in the video) and that guy doesn't even wear gloves, that is confidence, in Cold Steel's disability insurance.

Skip to 1:40 and the president of the company is talking about using two swords when he says "I'm a huge fan of two swords, I fight with two knives alot". At this point I'm thinking to myself that this guy is insane, he "fights with two knives alot", how many people has this guy killed? Who would pick a fight with the president of a knife/sword company?

Skip to 2:50 to see the president get down to business. They spent the majority of the video playing around with cutting tiny ropes and bamboo and stuff, now bring out the human analogues. Mythbusters uses pigs all the time because they are about the same as a human body, so effectively the president is showing you what his swords can do to a human. He doesn't waste any time and cuts off the pigs head effortlessly, then cuts the whole pig in half, at this point I'm thinking that a sword is a very good option for personal defense in a home invasion situation, and in the meantime you can have awesome barbeques, or perfectly sliced fruit.